Vezain, Stephanie loved rping with you. In a lot of ways, I saw that the Vezain/Pheobe rp gave her joy. One of the reasons why she loved those she intimately rped with and talked to on msn was because for the past several months she was stuck in bed on many occasions. Taking chemo and other medicines would make her sick, so she had to stay in bed. She was so happy to have people to talk to online, because it was really lonely for her.
Sunday night, I was lucky, thank God, to have had a chance to talk with her. As weird as it is, I remember feeling as if I was saying good bye to her. I remember telling her that I loved her and that I would see her in heaven and hug her. Vezain, I guess we'll both see her in heaven.
Sometimes, life really sucks. And things like this definitely hurt, but God has a way of using things for good, which is something that may not be seen for a long time. I find it helpful to just talk about things with my friends, family, and others. Talking about it, helps us realize how we are really feeling, what we've lost, hear ourselves talk about it, and a lot of other things. It's good to cry and let it out. You're not alone in grieving.
Stephanie (Geneveve, Pheobe, and others)
I am posting a few items from people who were close to Stephanie OOC... This first one I am posting is on behalf of Patrick who played Paskry, but was sitebanned. I hope this will not cause any grief, because he was a close friend of Steph's and wanted to put up a message for her... So here goes...
I met Stephanie during the creation of Phoebe, when she was just starting FK. She asked me for help with a few things and we got started talking over Aim. I haven't gone 24 hours without thinking about her since that day; talking to her four or five times a day was the standard, not the exception, and its going to be hard to accept that its not going to happen anymore. Stephanie is a wonderful person who was always happy for other people, even when they were not happy with themselves. When she told me about her history with cancer, I was floored. Here was someone who was suffering for years at a time, and here I was stressing about happenings at school.... and she never judged me, she only offered me encouragement. I listened as she told me about how her brothers would come and save her from the spider on the windowsill. Its hard to write about her. Over the summer she took a clinical trial that had a one in thirty five chance of working; she informed everyone that it worked, and that she was going to reside with us for a while. The truth is, it didn't. She protected everyone from months of pain and grieving, even if she couldn't protect herself. Through this time, she was proposed to, and she was lined up to get married. The stroke came out of nowhere. In the two weeks that followed, we all grieved for her, and we all laughed with her. Sunday, she thanked me for being a good friend, and she told me goodbye. Three hours later.... I am going to risk sounding melodramatic, but the world is a darker place without her smile to brighten it. She is a kind-hearted soul who never stopped loving, even those who hated her most, she loved with abandon. If I was half the person she is, I can't imagine the impact I could have. Steph reached out and touched people, changing their lives forever. I count myself blessed to have been able to say goodbye and I love you to her, somehow I knew it was a final goodbye. It was an honor, and a privilege to have lived and to have laughed with her. Steph came and made her impact, and the world was unprepared for the shockwaves. She lived her life under the motto, 'Cry not, for it is over. Laugh, because it happened' and I can think of no other way to pay a solid tribute to her memory than to continue carrying that torch where she left off. For Stephanie. For Michael. For Maggie. May we all be reunited once more when it will be our time to pass the torch of goodness.
The worrywart,
Patrick
I met Stephanie during the creation of Phoebe, when she was just starting FK. She asked me for help with a few things and we got started talking over Aim. I haven't gone 24 hours without thinking about her since that day; talking to her four or five times a day was the standard, not the exception, and its going to be hard to accept that its not going to happen anymore. Stephanie is a wonderful person who was always happy for other people, even when they were not happy with themselves. When she told me about her history with cancer, I was floored. Here was someone who was suffering for years at a time, and here I was stressing about happenings at school.... and she never judged me, she only offered me encouragement. I listened as she told me about how her brothers would come and save her from the spider on the windowsill. Its hard to write about her. Over the summer she took a clinical trial that had a one in thirty five chance of working; she informed everyone that it worked, and that she was going to reside with us for a while. The truth is, it didn't. She protected everyone from months of pain and grieving, even if she couldn't protect herself. Through this time, she was proposed to, and she was lined up to get married. The stroke came out of nowhere. In the two weeks that followed, we all grieved for her, and we all laughed with her. Sunday, she thanked me for being a good friend, and she told me goodbye. Three hours later.... I am going to risk sounding melodramatic, but the world is a darker place without her smile to brighten it. She is a kind-hearted soul who never stopped loving, even those who hated her most, she loved with abandon. If I was half the person she is, I can't imagine the impact I could have. Steph reached out and touched people, changing their lives forever. I count myself blessed to have been able to say goodbye and I love you to her, somehow I knew it was a final goodbye. It was an honor, and a privilege to have lived and to have laughed with her. Steph came and made her impact, and the world was unprepared for the shockwaves. She lived her life under the motto, 'Cry not, for it is over. Laugh, because it happened' and I can think of no other way to pay a solid tribute to her memory than to continue carrying that torch where she left off. For Stephanie. For Michael. For Maggie. May we all be reunited once more when it will be our time to pass the torch of goodness.
The worrywart,
Patrick
This following letter, I am posting on Maggie and Michael's behalf. She was Stephanie's roomate and Michael was her fiance. They both wanted to thank all of you for your words... so here is a letter from her:
Hello, my name is Maggie. I have been Stephanie’s roommate for a while now. Yesterday I got online to start informing people of what had happened, and somehow I started getting all these worried IMs from people I did not even know. I started talking with a few of you and as I talked I recognized you to be people I have heard her talk about.
Someone mentioned this website for this forum to me, and so today I thought I would take a look. I could not help but cry as I read through them. None of you know how much it would have meant to her to have seen this. Stephanie has been sick the whole time I have known her. And FK really meant a lot to her. She could take her computer when she was having to sit in the hospital and play and be a totally different person in a different place. Of course I would always make fun of her when I caught her playing, but what are friends for right? She would say it was like you were all writing a story together.
I really never knew much about the game until the last couple of weeks. I’m not much of a computer person, but over the last few weeks there was not much else she could do besides just lay in bed, I was letting her teach me to play FK. You all talk about how much she brought to your rp, but I thought you should know how much you all meant to her. You were there for her to talk to and joke around with, when there was no one else for her.
You talk about how she seemed so happy, something she used to always say to me when I would get sad around her “Sadness and feeling sorry for yourself is something people choose to do, and why would you choose to feel sad if there is even a teeny chance for happiness available?” She was in fact annoyingly happy at times, I could come home after having a horrible day (I am known for my “blonde moments” though I have not one light colored hair on my head),..and just want to sit around and mope, and there she would be…the one person I could think of that had any reason to be in a worse mood than me and she would just be cheery and make me be in a better mood.
Mariela, if you could only see the clothes in Steph’s closet… that pink story would be so much funnier to you. Some other things about Stephanie … Absolutely loved to eat and could probably win any eating contest she was entered in, but much to the hate of everyone around her, never weighed over 100 pounds. So when I would complain about being overweight she would just settle down with a bowl of ice-cream to taunt me I think. When she was not sick and feeling well, she was very active. Played all sorts of sports, and had a job welding for the state. I saw her RP Pheobe’s fear of lightning once… take that, multiply it by 100 and it will not even come close to her fear or reaction of spiders.
I think she just really enjoyed being able to get online and do things that she was not able to do in real life anymore. I’ve shown some of these messages to her fiancé and we both were just so touched. We wanted to thank you for all of the kind words and thoughts. I’m kind of a mess right now, so I am not sure how this whole thing came out, but it was meant as a thank you, and just to let a few of you who did not know her, in on the kind of person she was.
Hello, my name is Maggie. I have been Stephanie’s roommate for a while now. Yesterday I got online to start informing people of what had happened, and somehow I started getting all these worried IMs from people I did not even know. I started talking with a few of you and as I talked I recognized you to be people I have heard her talk about.
Someone mentioned this website for this forum to me, and so today I thought I would take a look. I could not help but cry as I read through them. None of you know how much it would have meant to her to have seen this. Stephanie has been sick the whole time I have known her. And FK really meant a lot to her. She could take her computer when she was having to sit in the hospital and play and be a totally different person in a different place. Of course I would always make fun of her when I caught her playing, but what are friends for right? She would say it was like you were all writing a story together.
I really never knew much about the game until the last couple of weeks. I’m not much of a computer person, but over the last few weeks there was not much else she could do besides just lay in bed, I was letting her teach me to play FK. You all talk about how much she brought to your rp, but I thought you should know how much you all meant to her. You were there for her to talk to and joke around with, when there was no one else for her.
You talk about how she seemed so happy, something she used to always say to me when I would get sad around her “Sadness and feeling sorry for yourself is something people choose to do, and why would you choose to feel sad if there is even a teeny chance for happiness available?” She was in fact annoyingly happy at times, I could come home after having a horrible day (I am known for my “blonde moments” though I have not one light colored hair on my head),..and just want to sit around and mope, and there she would be…the one person I could think of that had any reason to be in a worse mood than me and she would just be cheery and make me be in a better mood.
Mariela, if you could only see the clothes in Steph’s closet… that pink story would be so much funnier to you. Some other things about Stephanie … Absolutely loved to eat and could probably win any eating contest she was entered in, but much to the hate of everyone around her, never weighed over 100 pounds. So when I would complain about being overweight she would just settle down with a bowl of ice-cream to taunt me I think. When she was not sick and feeling well, she was very active. Played all sorts of sports, and had a job welding for the state. I saw her RP Pheobe’s fear of lightning once… take that, multiply it by 100 and it will not even come close to her fear or reaction of spiders.
I think she just really enjoyed being able to get online and do things that she was not able to do in real life anymore. I’ve shown some of these messages to her fiancé and we both were just so touched. We wanted to thank you for all of the kind words and thoughts. I’m kind of a mess right now, so I am not sure how this whole thing came out, but it was meant as a thank you, and just to let a few of you who did not know her, in on the kind of person she was.
There isn't much I can say that can add to what's already been said. I just wish I could have gotten to know Stephanie in the time we played together. Instead of trying to say anything and making a mess of it, I'll just share some of the good times of the RP. This is barely scraping the surface. She was one player I could always have a good time with, and she made Apillini that much more fun for me to play. One thing I have noticed about her characters, especially Pheobe, is that many, many people's characters are able to say that Pheobe was one of their best friends. I have to pitch in my agreement to this; Pheobe was one of my character's favourite people, too.
I have so many memories of RP with her as Apillini that I don't even know where to start. I remember Geneveve earlier on, getting her leg chopped off so many times by goblins that she was sure it would just fall off on its own while she was walking. I remember Pheobe and Apillini sharing that same fear of lightning, and how Pheobe was always there when anyone needed anything done. I remember how frightening Dorinia was! Throwing about her masks and dolls at unsuspecting people . . . just vicious!
We will miss you, Stephanie. Thank you for sharing your time with us on FK. I hope that you are still happy and smiling, wherever you are.
I have so many memories of RP with her as Apillini that I don't even know where to start. I remember Geneveve earlier on, getting her leg chopped off so many times by goblins that she was sure it would just fall off on its own while she was walking. I remember Pheobe and Apillini sharing that same fear of lightning, and how Pheobe was always there when anyone needed anything done. I remember how frightening Dorinia was! Throwing about her masks and dolls at unsuspecting people . . . just vicious!
We will miss you, Stephanie. Thank you for sharing your time with us on FK. I hope that you are still happy and smiling, wherever you are.
Land ho!
In memory of a good friend
I started talking with Stephanie when she first started Geneveve
It was so wonderful to talk with someone like her. I enjoyed the rps that any of her characters, and Dapher got into. She was always willing to help, and include anyone around her.
More importantly than knowing her IC I knew her OOC. When I spoke with Patrick (Paskry) OOC over the phone he told me about her situation, and how it had affected her. I found out the night that she died that she did have cancer, and.... I am sorry to say that I never got to speak to her about it....I wish there was so much more I could have done for her but there was nothing. I pray for her, and her friends especially her fiance. I herd of her last moments and it is so touching that she did have someone there for her, and that means so much to one of her friends.
Stephanie was always ready to talk to me about any problem that I had, or any stupid little thing....and while I was complaining about my problems she was going through more than anyone of us could imagine. She was strong, and someone that I can always look back on, and say "I wish I could be like that"
It was so wonderful to talk with someone like her. I enjoyed the rps that any of her characters, and Dapher got into. She was always willing to help, and include anyone around her.
More importantly than knowing her IC I knew her OOC. When I spoke with Patrick (Paskry) OOC over the phone he told me about her situation, and how it had affected her. I found out the night that she died that she did have cancer, and.... I am sorry to say that I never got to speak to her about it....I wish there was so much more I could have done for her but there was nothing. I pray for her, and her friends especially her fiance. I herd of her last moments and it is so touching that she did have someone there for her, and that means so much to one of her friends.
Stephanie was always ready to talk to me about any problem that I had, or any stupid little thing....and while I was complaining about my problems she was going through more than anyone of us could imagine. She was strong, and someone that I can always look back on, and say "I wish I could be like that"
Re: In memory of a good friend
I know we shouldn't just post an agreement... but...Dapher wrote:She was strong, and someone that I can always look back on, and say "I wish I could be like that"
This is exactly what I think when I think about her...
I wish I could be more like her... a stronger person that other people... mostly including my son... can look back at what i have done... and say the same
R.I.P.
You will never be forgotten..
In memory of Stephanie
and the best damn RPing I have ever had!
Thank you
You will never be forgotten..
In memory of Stephanie
and the best damn RPing I have ever had!
Thank you
I too, will miss the wonderful RP of Stephanie's characters. I never got to speak with her thru IM's or knew her in real life, but I am so glad to hear from all of those who did and know that she put a lot of herself into her characters and was a kindred soul to me. I am pretty sure that if she was laughing in the game, she was laughing in real life, too. And I am just happy that I was able to help her laugh and hopefully make her day a bit brighter. I will treasure the time I DID get to spend with her in the game. I hope she can look down upon her loved ones and maybe even look in on US from time to time and smile. God bless you, Stephanie.
What the Mind of a man can conceive, the Will of a man can achieve.
I have to say, Stephanie was one (actually several!) of the all-around nicest, most cheerful and fun people to be around that I've ever met. She gave me the best first impression of this game - I strongly remember all the times she helped me out - and continued to make it a fun and welcoming experience. I'm glad to have had the opportunity to meet her and play a game with her, and share some jokes. She set a great example for kindness and good humor that I know will carry on - even for those of us who just knew her characters.
Stephanie's friends and family, thank you for sharing this personal news with us. I wish you all peace.
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I know but one freedom, and that is freedom of the mind.
Stephanie's friends and family, thank you for sharing this personal news with us. I wish you all peace.
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I know but one freedom, and that is freedom of the mind.
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Alaudrien
- Sword Grand Master
- Posts: 353
- Joined: Thu Mar 03, 2005 1:33 pm
- Location: Waterdeep
- Contact:
Oh my g%^@^ I am so sad now. I adored Stephanie. She was one of the sweetest persons I knew in game and out. I am saddened I am just learning this now of all times. Heck I wish I could have known her in person. She lives not far from me as well. I am not one to tears but for this I cry...and wish I coulda known her better as the friend she was to me and so many others. 
I take only what I need and I need everything!
-Alyzlin
-Alyzlin
I know most of you do not live anywhere near me, but I thought this announcement would bring warmth to those that care for Stephanie. Prescott Valley Youth Chamber of Comerce is hosting, and setting up a charity run for Luchemia (sorry, have no idea how to spell it) research.
All profits will go to Saint Judes Hospitale, for the research done there. The run will take place April. If any of you live in Northern Arizona, then here is a chance to go watch, or even run.
We miss and love you dearly Stephanie
All profits will go to Saint Judes Hospitale, for the research done there. The run will take place April. If any of you live in Northern Arizona, then here is a chance to go watch, or even run.
We miss and love you dearly Stephanie
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Mouat
- Sword Master
- Posts: 204
- Joined: Sat Mar 26, 2005 8:45 pm
- Location: Northern Forests near Luskan.
she will be missed...
As some of you know, this topic is very close to my heart as my wife is battling through cancer as well.
I did not know her outside of the game, but I do remember interacting with her mostly with Mouat. She will be dearly missed. My condolances to those that new her.
I did not know her outside of the game, but I do remember interacting with her mostly with Mouat. She will be dearly missed. My condolances to those that new her.
Pink!
A year later, and still missed, Stephanie.
Mouat,
best wishes. Let us know if you need anything. Even if it is just a smile.
A year later, and still missed, Stephanie.
Mouat,
best wishes. Let us know if you need anything. Even if it is just a smile.
Confusion heard his voice, and wild uproar Stood ruled, stood vast infinitude confined;
Till at his second bidding darkness fled, Light shone, and order from disorder sprung.
--John Milton
Till at his second bidding darkness fled, Light shone, and order from disorder sprung.
--John Milton
This is sooo sad, I am...crying as I write this. Last night... December 5th. I just got on, and read this, and it just broke me down. I will always remember December 5.
But for Mouat, and your dear wife. I know many foundations that support, and raise money for cancer patients, as well as research. I am sure you all saw it, earlier I posted something about a run for cancer research. Well, there is a foundation called the Susan B Coleman foundation. They held a walk in Pheonix, over 30, 000 people ran, or walked to raise money for cancer research. Children as young as 5, fighting a terrible battler that I could not imagine, adult, even elderly useing walkers to go up the streets of Pheonix to raise money for an incredible cause. I am the vice president of the Youth CHamber of Comerce, and we sent a group of 12 high school student 120 miles to Pheonix to help this cause. If ANYONE has any more information on such projects, let me know, I will do all that I can to help, give ideas, contacts, and what not. But there is hope, there are people out there that will do what they can to help.
I, a senior in high school salute you, I honor those out there that sacrifice there time, to help others. And as for Stphanie, I will always remember her, and I still to this day look back and think "I wish I were that strong"
Stephanie, we love you, and miss you.
But for Mouat, and your dear wife. I know many foundations that support, and raise money for cancer patients, as well as research. I am sure you all saw it, earlier I posted something about a run for cancer research. Well, there is a foundation called the Susan B Coleman foundation. They held a walk in Pheonix, over 30, 000 people ran, or walked to raise money for cancer research. Children as young as 5, fighting a terrible battler that I could not imagine, adult, even elderly useing walkers to go up the streets of Pheonix to raise money for an incredible cause. I am the vice president of the Youth CHamber of Comerce, and we sent a group of 12 high school student 120 miles to Pheonix to help this cause. If ANYONE has any more information on such projects, let me know, I will do all that I can to help, give ideas, contacts, and what not. But there is hope, there are people out there that will do what they can to help.
I, a senior in high school salute you, I honor those out there that sacrifice there time, to help others. And as for Stphanie, I will always remember her, and I still to this day look back and think "I wish I were that strong"
Stephanie, we love you, and miss you.